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What Family & Friends Can Do

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Ways People Helped Us

  • My brother-in-law drove me to the cemetery and went with me (without intruding) as I chose a plot.
     
  • My in-laws went with me to the funeral home to choose a casket and arrange the funeral. It helps not to have to make all the decisions alone.
     
  • My mother and in-laws answered the phone and took care of greeting visitors.
     
  • My mother and mother in-law picked up some beautiful dresses at a children’s clothing store so I could choose something special to bury Emma. I chose one and they returned the rest.
     
  • My brothers-in-law helped to limit visitors to my husband. He was in critical condition, and did not need to deal with visitors.
     
  • Our friends, neighbors and church sent food for a month so I didn't have to shop or cook. Although, after a while I wanted to do it to have some sense of normalcy.
     
  • My friends took me out to dinner and let me talk about it. It's always on your mind - the crash, the loss, everything and it helps to be able to vent. Just listen.
     
  • Acknowledge the loss. Say something like "I don't know what to say" if you can't find the words, but don't ignore our pain and grief or think that you are being kind not to bring it up. It is always there, unspoken. Give us the chance to let some of the feelings out.
     
  • Go to the Compassionate Friends or the MADD website to see other ways to help.